The Star In My Heart From Live Journal 7-29-11

The Star In My Heart, a photo by northwoodsluna on Flickr.

Good Morning Universe! Some days it's a challenge to find the peace in the midst of the eddy of the storms of life roaring, whirling and swirling around me, yet when I still myself, quiet my soul and breathe, the spinning stops and I realize that I have been spinning "widdershins" while all around me spins "deasil. It is hard to listen to Goddess when I don't give her full attention and focus. In a moment of tranquil silence the elegant, succinct whisper comes, "Woman be still and know..." That whisper of the Goddess shines like a star in my heart and lights the way in the dark times.

An 8 week art journey group I belong to has a theme every week. This week is gratitude.

Gratitude is a theme I can jump all over, it's the brightest color in the tapestry of my life! Not that gratitude that we sometimes feel when some one loves us when we feel unlovable (NONE of us are unlovable), or when another tosses us scraps of their time and attention to our hungry "unworthy" selves (I think that we should all scrap that word *unworthy in our vocabulary of self-definition). It's NOT gratitude that we feel when someone gives us begrudging forgiveness for our imperfection, our mistakes, or our failures to meet THEIR expectations, guilt based thankfulness is NOT gratitude.

True Gratitude opens our heart and our hands. The opening of heart and hands has a twofold purpose, to share what we have, and to receive more of the abundance that The Universe holds in trust for us until we are ready to receive it. Gratitude is liberating, it frees our spirit. An attitude of gratitude is reflected in a generous spirit and an open heart. We can not feel true gratitude when we hold onto what we have with tight grubby fists like a child who doesn't want to share their M&Ms, what we are left with is a congealed icky mess that doesn't resemble the lovely sweet gift we were first given. We are so busy trying to hang onto something that we forget to enjoy it, and deny ourselves the pleasure from seeing/hearing another's enjoyment of our gift. Candy shared from an open hand is twice the pleasure. Have you ever looked at the rainbow of colors left on your hand after holding on, loosely, to a handful of M&Ms?

Opening our hands and heart, rather than trying so desperately to hold onto something in a tight fist or closed heart, prevents us from receiving anything more. There is always more, there is always enough, we are brave enough to take the risk, strong enough to endure letting go and sharing even when the other is greedy or unappreciative, worthy enough to receive, loveable enough to be loved, and talented enough, unique enough, beautiful enough, and worthy of forgiveness of our imperfect humanity.
.
Moments in life are like those M&Ms, we need to savor them, share them and hold them in an open hand, and acknowledge the colors they leave behind, in our hearts, our hands. Yes, we might drop some, and yes some may melt, someone may take some without our permission, some will reject our treasue we wish to share. Life is like that sometimes.

I wonder what "M&Ms" each of us will be given and share today?