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Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Back from Fargo from Live Journal 7-14-11

I am unable to load here to blogger, the 2 short videos of our granddaughter Ashlyn Rose we took on our visit to Fargo on 7/12-713/11 but you can view them here: http://hartsong1972.livejournal.com/678185.html

Two short videos of our granddaughter Ashlyn taken Tuesday evening with my phone. I'm going to have to figure out how to load the other two from my phone, they were too big to e-mail from my phone.
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We visited with John and Ashlyn Tuesday night in Fargo. We are amazed at his strength, but it is THIS little girl and his family and friends who are holding him up throughout this ordeal. We did enjoy the time with John, it was good to be there and hug my boy and play & get kisses from Ashlyn. What a little love she is, and what joy she brings all of us! Nancy and Jay (Ashlyn's godparents) came down for a while. Nancy and I went down the street to visit with Whiting's wife for a bit. That woman is so broken, we just love her so much! She's grieving the loss of her friendship with Angie more than the break up of their marriage. After we got back to the hotel from visiting John and Ashlyn we spent an hour on the phone with Kay and Noah. I'm just as worried about Noah as I am about John. He and his brother are so close that Noah is grieving deeply. He loved Angie so much. But John's head is in a good place. He is acknowledging that he and Angie had 11 1/2 good years before all the deceit began a few months ago. She seems to have been planning this for a while, she's not only screwed John royally financially, she probably broke up Whitings' marriage. John told us some things that happened when he and Angie would fight, she hit him a lot when they fought, but he never laid a hand on her back. She just seems nutz! . Tom said that he thinks that Angie may need medication. In our attempts to make sense of all of this Tom wondered if perhaps this might have come out of a sort of postpartum depression with a late onset after Ashlyn's birth. We know that Angie loves Ashlyn and was a good mother and wasn't thinking clearly when she walked out.

Spent time on the phone with Julie who wanted to know how our visit with John went and how her brother is doing.
I spent all day in training yesterday, Crisis Prevention Intervention all morning, and CPR all afternoon. The trainings were held at a Catholic Church where there was a lovely garden out back. I spent every break sitting on a stone bench in front of a statue of Mary, one of the faces of my Goddess. It was restful and lovely. We left Fargo about 5 and stopped for a nice dinner (I had a margarita). I slept the 2 hours in the car between Fargo and Bemidji where we stopped for dinner. It's been such an exhausting week on so many levels that I'm glad that tomorrow is Friday! We got home about 10 last night and then were on the phone with Julie for a while after that. I'm so tired today! But feeling better having seen John.
John and Angie are meeting with his lawyer this morning and then she is spending time at the house to pack up some of her stuff. Originally I was going to be there today after the training I had yesterday but changed plans when everything blew up last week. She told John that she "didn't want your fucking mother sitting around all day while I'm there." I realize that it's her guilt about what she's done, and the reality that she really is alone with Whiting in all this. ALL of her family and friends are disgusted and angry so they don't really have the support that they thought they'd have. They've rented a townhouse together. The neighborhood in an attempt at gallows humor, has set up a pool betting on how long it lasts between the two of them. John is really going the extra mile to make the divorce as painless for Ashlyn as possible. He does not want to keep her away from her mommy, he knows she needs that. He set up a schedule of every other day for Ashlyn to be spending time with Angie and overnight visits. But still there will be ugliness in the midst of all this I imagine. Because it IS an ugly turn of events.
But still all in all, I do believe that life is good, and hope keeps me afloat! Each day is getting a little bit better all the time. :-)

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